The Past
by Kaiyoung
Summary: Natasha's Past comes haunting in an unsuspecting way, A few trigger warnings for rape, Pepper, Bruce and Thor are also featured.
AN-So I am having a little writer's block on my A.O.S story, I'm working on it but it's slow coming in the mean time this is a one shot that came out of me trying to write my next chapter…..

Disclaimer-I don't own the Avengers so don't sue me, I'm poor.

It was after the winter soldier's debut, the team was settling into stark towers getting to know each other as a team and learning how to work together. IT was a Saturday morning and they were all together uncharacteristically in the tower.

They were sitting around the living room, a movie was playing but they were all talking around it and joking with each other. Natasha was curled up on the chair a throw over her lap watching everything with a keen eye. To her left was Clint who would occasionally tickle her foot making her yank it up and below her.

Across from her Bruce and Tony were steadily talking about a topic that she knew nothing about, sitting a little away from them were Steve and Sam who were both talking to Pepper about the modifications on Sam's Suit, although Pepper looked ready to run away from the conversation and finally to Thor who was intently staring at the screen.

Smiling softly at her team mates Natasha lifted her Stark Pad flipping through the catalogue she needed some new things but she didn't want to go into stores to shop.

Pausing as Happy walked in she acknowledged his presence as a non threatening before staring back at the screen vaguely recognizing that Happy was handing them their mail, taking the letter he handed to her she slipped it besides her gaze still focused intently on the screen.

"Thanks" not even looking up as she uttered a soft thanks to happy she clicked away at the screen in front of her, she was so intently focused she almost missed the gasp that Steve let out, quickly looking around she looked for a threat but all she found Steve staring at paper's in his hand and the Captain was turning as red a Natasha's hair.

"What's wrong?" Eyebrow arching as she stood up with the rest of the team and headed to their captain "Steve?"

She was stunned as he shoved the paper in her hand "Steve?" Questioning him she reluctantly looked down at the paper and he shoved in her hand.

Staring back her with hair as red as blood and eyes that were dead was herself, she couldn't be no older than 12 and she was sitting half naked in a bed with Bucky staring back at her was herself, her world narrowed in on the photo as she stared at it.

Staring at the broken child in the picture she brushed a hand over her face, it was like a dream she is complete disbelief "Who sent this?"

Her voice cracking as she stared down at the broken child in the picture stunned, "who the hell took this, who sent this?" she thought this was a memory they implanted.

Jumping as Steve grabbed her arm she was shocked as he shook her "Is that not you?" Shaking the arm her had a hold of Steve growled in her face "I thought you didn't know him" he was shaking her again but she was too stunned to shove him of off her.

"Steve…I "But she couldn't answer him because she didn't think the memory was real, she flinched as Clint moved forward and pried Steve's hands of off her arm, barely glancing at the photo he grabbed it from her hand and lead her to the elevator.

Ignoring Steve's protest she stared of at the wall vaguely heard Clint throwing a comment at the team before leading her into the elevator, she waited for the doors to close before throwing herself into Clint's arms.

"Shhh"

Rocking Nat as he held her to his chest, she wasn't crying but she was clutching on to Clint like a life line "Nat?" Tipping his head back to look at her Clint frowned as she shook her head burying her face in his neck.

Leading her into his personal quarters Clint lead her to his bedroom, sitting her down he headed into the kitchen opening the fridge he grabbed a bottle of water, heading back to the bedroom he frowned when he entered and didn't see Natasha sitting where he left her.

Dropping the bottle as he realized her balcony door was open "Nat?" Rushing to the door he sighed in relief as Clint realized that Natasha was sitting in the corner of the balcony hugging her knees to her chest.

Dropping to his knee in front of her "Hey sweetheart"

"It's like I can't get away from them" Staring at her knees as she hugged herself, she spoke low eyes blank as her mind took her back to the past.

"It's like a dream you know, the more I reach for the memory the further away it is" Gripping her legs she looked down at him looking like the lost little girl in the photo "I can feel how scared she….I mean I was" Shaking her head she looked down at him biting at her lip.

"I can…..I can" Brushing her hair from his face she shook her head "I can feel him in me, I was so scared" Sobbing softly she went easily into his arms clutching at his shoulders, face pushed into his neck he held her as she broke in his arms.

"Saying no wasn't an option" Clutching him, Clint lowered them to the floor and pulled Natasha in his lap. "It hurt so much" Face pushed into Clint's shoulder she spoke softly in the monotone voice that he hated to hear come out of her mouth.

"I….they took me to his room, pushed me in and closed the door" hands clenched into Clint's shirt "I heard stories, of what happened when the soldier got to you" Brow furrowed she leaned up to look at him.

"Nat" This was more than he ever thought she would tell him, he knew some of what the red room put them through she told him some things but he had never heard this story. "You don't have to tell me anymore"

But she shook her head wildly at him, red curls flying around her head "No I, I have to get this out" Tangling her hand in his shirt she sighed softly. "I remember, just wishing for it to end, it hurt so much, my whole body just hurt"

Sniffling softly she looked down "There were bruises everywhere, and when he was done they just left me laying there" Voice sounding bitter she glared at the wall, tears running unchecked down her cheeks as she cried for the little girl who no one helped.

Rocking the red head like a small child, he had never seen her like this ever before, and it scared him he didn't want to let her go.

Pressing his forehead to the top of her hair "Nat, I'm so sorry"

Looking up at him she gave him a sad little smile "That was the first time I ever wanted to die" Hearing a loud gasp behind them they turned the rest of the avengers were standing behind them looking upset at the red head's soft spoken confession, tightening the hold he had on Natasha he cursed silently as she got quiet and pushed her face back in his neck.

A few minutes ago….

Pepper bent down and picked the picture up from the floor, lifting it she gasped softly shoving it back at Steve she turned and wrapped her arms around Tony's neck clutching on to him "She's was a baby"

Spinning she pushed away from Tony and rounded on Steve "Look at that picture" Shoving it up to his face she glared at him "That's a naked child in a grown man's bed"

Brushing angry tears from her face she shook her head "If that was me, I wouldn't tell you I knew him" With a broken sob for the child she couldn't save she turned her back on Steve looking around she looked them all in the eye one at a time.

"Was she supposed to say, oh I know him he fucked me when I was 12?" Pulling away from Tony she turned and stormed away, she was upset and she knew she would say something she regretted if she stood there any longer.

Getting to the elevator she collapsed against the wall, covering her mouth she slid down and pulled her knees to her chest sobbing.

"Pepper" Tony slipped in the closing elevator doors dropping down he pulled Pepper close; he couldn't believe that something like that happened to their badass assassin, holding Pepper to his chest they couldn't protect Natasha then but they could protect her now.

Standing her pulled her to his chest, pushing the elevator for Clint's floor; he knew Pepper would want to see Natasha, getting of the elevator they paused as the rest of the team got off the next elevator.

"Cap" Pausing in front of Steve he frowned at the all American good boy who was a little more tainted in his eyes "If you grab Natasha like that again I'm going to punch you in your all American face" Shaking his head he turned and lead Pepper in the apartment.

"That was the first time I wanted to die" She heard one of the other's gasping besides her, seeing Natasha burying her face in Clint's shoulder; Pepper kicked her shoes of and dropped to the floor besides Clint.

Leaning over she wrapped her arms around both Clint and Natasha "It's not your Fault Nat" Pushing the other red head's curls over her shoulder she hugged both assassins.

Jumping a little as Tony slid down besides her, he ran his hands through his hair awkwardly "Do you want us to avenge you" Rolling her eyes at Tony she shook her head.

"I killed them all already" Pepper blew out a breath; she could say she was shocked but it was Natasha and she didn't really expect different from the other red head, smiling at Thor as he motioned her to move a little over she slid into Tony's lap to make room for the Asgardian.

Shaking his fist at Natasha he boomed out "I bet the battle was glorious"

Shrugging at Thor the red head smiled a dark smile "Not so glorious but bloody" Wrinkling his nose Bruce dropped down besides the god.

"I'm glad you got your revenge Nat" For the normally peaceful doctor to say that to her made Natasha smile.

"Thanks Bruce" Taking a deep breath she turned to the last member of their rag tag group, Steve who hovered in the doorway unsure of himself, keeping her hand clutched into Clint's she motioned for him to join them.

"We are what the red room made" sighing she knew that Steve logically knew there were bad people in the world but he was still naïve about some things.

"They make you what they want, if you don't listen they wipe you and they wipe your personality implant what they want and start all over again making you want they want" Shaking her head to shake out the memories she smiled sardonically at him.

"Your friend is in there but he isn't what you remember, the red room has erased what he is and changed him over and over again into what they want him to be" Motioning the Captain forward they shifted to make room for him to sit down.

Sitting with a heavy sigh, he gave the bruises on her arms a guilty look "I'm so sorry Natasha" Leaning over he ran his hands over hers gently "Please forgive me, I never wanted to hurt you"

Smiling sadly at Steve she shrugged one shoulder "its ok Steve bruises fade" Shrugging again she leaned her head against Clint's shoulder blowing out a breath" She never wanted any of them to know the details of her life, she didn't want them to treat her any different.

Turning as Steve leaned over she pushed away from Clint and wrapped her arms around his neck "I'm still sorry" and even though he didn't have to she knew he was apologizing for his friend.

Looking around at her team and Pepper she squeezed Steve's hand and hugged her other arm around Clint's neck, they were becoming a family and even though they now knew something so personal about her they were a little closer together.

A/N- Review, tell me what you guys think, the characters are definitely OOC but eh let me know what's on your mind.


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